Yeah, that title probably isn’t going to sit too well with Mum’s out there. I apologise profusely if it offends you, however, why should I say sorry? I’m 25 and I’ve not had kids yet. But why do I feel like I feel like I might as well bear child? That’s where social media comes in. Everyday I will scroll through my Facebook feed of loving, adorable snaps of people’s kids, and then some more kids, oh and here’s another baby for good measure, ”Oh would you like baba with that ironic photo too?”
I think I had a mini mid-twenties crisis on my blogging hiatus. I’m 25 next month, no biggie? A whole quarter of a century and halfway to fifty. You can probably hear the sound of me hitting my head against the laptop whilst you read this. In fact there is a whole wikipedia post on the matter!
Whilst I took my hiatus, I thought at the time it was a perfect opportunity to relax and not have to worry about scheduling posts and how many hits the page had. It was going to be a time to just not have to think about anything, really. Looking back on that period I realised whilst it was good for my blogging soul, that month I tortured myself with other things to replace the blogging void in my life.
Rightmove. I love looking at houses at the best of times, but this website consumed me for a whole month. Ever find yourself lusting after a house? Yeah, me too. But, instead of just looking at them on the website I decided I was going to to book two viewings, luckily, my current Husband & I (I say ‘’current’’ as I swear he wanted to kill/divorce me after receiving email after email of suggested homes we should go view!) was saved as one had just been taken off the market. We went to view the house, it was ok, I obviously went in to it with my head over heart but it was a good job the other half was there to keep me in real world & thankfully we didn’t end up with a mortgage the size of the whole universe.
My mind had been plagued with thoughts of babies. God help me?! I was obsessed with the fact we needed a bigger house for the eventualities that a brood might bring, because our little two up/two down would not cope with this. What?! I mean, Mr C & I know we don’t want to hear the tiny sound of pitter patters anytime soon, but for some reason I could not stop thinking about it. I even had a little weep when he told me that ‘’it wouldn’t be anytime soon.’’ I really had hit rock bottom.
You’re all probably groaning at my apparent meltdown because really, 25 is no age at all. I’ve bought a house, I’m married and I have a really good job that I enjoy. In fact most of you will think that I have done too much, too soon. Whilst you’re all probably right, I would not change it for the world.
I have some wonderful things in my life, that I am so grateful for! I’ve come to the conclusion that I can’t switch off and blogging is a tool that helps me keep focussed even if it is just typing a few random words every now & then. I also need to remember to live in the now and stop thinking about if’s and but’s of the future. What will be, will be. Que cera, cera!
25 is an exciting age where you can enjoy so much and live in the now!
Of course, my post ends happily because I feel like I have had an epiphany, I have so much to look forward to and I am just enjoying my little space on the world wide web too. So, if anyone else had a mid-twenties crisis in the run up to the (big) TWO FIVE, I would love to hear from you and how you dealt with it or are you going through it now? In which case, let me know so we can soldier on through this together!
If you need a little pick me up, please join me as a regular host of the #HappySelves chat over on twitter, every first Monday of the month (starting 3rd November 2014) it’s a lovely chat where we all share good vibes and I would love you to join me on this one as it will mark a week of me turning 25, I might need you 
Rebecca xxx
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If you are reading this, thank you. It means that you have clicked on my blog after weeks of no posts. My blog went mute. So did my brain.
Despite having lots of amazing posts about the music sets I saw at Lees Festival and the wonderful summer, I just haven’t been able to put finger to keyboard and write. A lot of bloggers talk about how they go on a break from their blog and how it gives them that well deserved break and detox that they oh so need. In the past I have taken a couple of days to re-group and get my thought process back together but it seems I took a little longer this time. I’m not sure if it’s the alcohol/dreamy daze that I have been in since Leeds Festival, but I think it goes back a bit pre-festival than that.
I was writing a lot of Fashion Posts. I asked myself, why on earth would anyone be bothered to read about my style and look at the photos I had posted. I think I felt a little stupid, if I am quite honest. Almost a little naive. The time it took working out my ”styled looks”, taking the photos, loading them on to the computer, deciding which 2 out of 50 photos made the cut, then writing and scheduling. It was all becoming a bit of a chore. I have never wanted blogging to feel like that so I decided it was best to just take a hiatus from all things in the blogosphere. Not just the blog, but my social media output too. I have been a lot quieter than usual on twitter and not promoting my blog for a little while, which a few of you had noticed.
Most non-bloggers won’t understand how much time, effort and pain goes in to writing blogs. If you are a non-blogger and take offence to that comment I sincerely apologise but seriously, it really is a long process to get our words out to you! Also, some bloggers will read this and roll their eyes ”one of them?” they will probably say. But we all hit a wall at some point. We are not perfect and sometimes you just need a little down time to yourself.
As I’m writing this, I’m happy. It feels like I’m talking from the heart and not forcing anything out that isn’t required because I’m not really having to think too hard about what I want to say. It feels natural. That is how blogging should feel.
Anyone feeling this way I urge you to just shut down blogspot/wordpress and stop tapping on your phone. If your blog is going to stand the test of time, people will still follow you. Hey, my blog has still received about 30 followers on blog lovin and I haven’t wrote diddley squat for weeks. At the end of it all your true readers will be there still and all things will pick up again when you have given yourself that time. Just don’t forget about you along the way.
I make no apologies for leaving my blog for a little while and neither should you. Expect better writing and posts from me, especially now the nights are drawing in with Autumn on our doorstep.
Lastly, thank you to those who are still reading this.
Rebecca xxx
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