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An Open Letter to Bloggers; Man Up & Go Get It | QueenBeady

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Life seems to be passing me by at a rapid rate at the moment. Blink and you miss everything. My life consists of a Monday to Friday job in an office, so you’d think that time would go slower than it does, but with a busy calendar it’s almost like my feet are moving without me even realising. I’m so grateful for the wonderful opportunities that my blog is seemingly bestowing me with at the moment. It’s exciting & exhilarating, I’ve finally had a moment in my ”blogging career” where I’ve thought ”I’ve had a special blogging moment” and that’s been a few times recently. That has taken FIVE WHOLE YEARS (remember this throughout the post). This is not a brag post and it annoys me to the very core that I should have to semi-advise/apologise for feeling good about something. Surely we should be championing each others achievements?

This is an open letter to all you Bloggers out there.

 

Hayley posted a wonderful Wittering Wednesday post this week about the social media/blogging world. I think she should be extremely proud of what she has achieved so far. Her following is on mass (much more than myself) and blog that is well articulated, yet funny at the same time. But it got me asking the question though; Are we ever going to be 100% happy with our blog?

Kind of like ourselves, we are a work in progress. Sometimes our stories are cut short and not necessarily have we done the things we set out to. Some lead long, prosperous lives but then at the back of their mind despite their successes, I’m sure they will be asking ”have I truly done what I set out to do?” – it sounds morbid, but you must hear me out. The blogging world is crazy at the moment. Everyone wants a piece of the action, whether it be for right or wrong reasons. In the last few months I’ve had countless people ask me for blogging advice on how to start a blog etc. Some I have relished being able to share my knowledge, albeit limited, and some I have helped knowing full well that their intentions are just that of, ”for the free stuff.” But through gritted teeth I’ve helped, giving them the best advice I can. You see, I want to be a person that can deep down say that I helped someone. Even if in a small way. I want to be the reason someone smiled and didn’t cry, especially on that truly, horrific day that they just had. I don’t want to be one of those bitches who looks down their nose at you because you only have 1% of their massive following or that you aren’t good enough to be in the ‘clique.’ Can’t we all just be taken at face value rather than a number?

Social media has helped me achieve this. Just through the verse of a few tweets between two strangers, with a common love for their own blogs I’ve been able to engage with so many lovely people and have eventually gone on to meet, you know in the real life flesh. They are no longer just twitter blog friends, they are real-life friends. And they are all just as nice in person as they are online. Some, even nicer!

There has been so many stories recently about how bloggers who use Instagram are creating this self-loathing pit we are all in, because we are looking at someone else’s account and wishing and hoping that was our life. Hey, I do it all the time but that’s for me to work out and the same goes for you, and you, yes and you. I can see you nodding and agreeing. In fact I’m probably half writing & half scrolling looking at someones perfectly perfect white background, a bunch of freshly cut flowers, a copy of vogue delicately laid on one of those H&M marble trays (you know the ones I’m talking about!). But I probably make someone else jealous too, and that person who is jealous of me will be making that girl who is eating her Fish & Chip Friday lunch feel crap as well. Were all our own demons. So where does it end?

We need to realise, jealously is normal. If you don’t like something, fix it. There is no right or wrong way to measure success. Ask yourself, does it feel good? If the answer is yes then I say you’ve done a pretty darned good job of whatever you were meant to do. As hard it might be, try not to compare your successes to someone else and this goes without saying the blogging world. If you are meant to get that chance to shine, you will get it. If you don’t get it, then that’s fine too. Be true to what you want to do, work hard because trust me,

Those who wait, will not get.

I’ve seen far too many talented, wonderful bloggers/writers/editors (whatever you want to call yourself) take a long, long break because they are disillusioned by the en-mass of newbie bloggers. Please remember, you are the reason that these people are going, you inspired them to do it! Fine, if you want a break because you just don’t have the vision or creativity to come up with new posts but if it’s because you’re not getting your break, man up, roll your socks up & keep working hard and being the best you want to be! If it is the latter, you need to stop being selfish too. I may sound harsh and hurtful, but in reality and in the ”normal world” it’s only like everyday life, you see something someone else has, you want a piece of the pie too. It’s the same in everyday scenarios. So let’s not spit our dummies out, shall we? Move with the times, try not to get left behind – if you want something, go bloody get it!

In short, do you. Not anyone else. Keep at it, because you got this girl!

Bee xxx

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Comments

52 responses to “An Open Letter to Bloggers; Man Up & Go Get It | QueenBeady”

  1. Beth Avatar
    Beth

    Urgh, Bee this is a brilliant post. You’ve hit the nail on the head and I can’t thank you enough for all the help you have to me a couple of months ago! Xx

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      Oh Beth,
      Thank you so much for taking the time to read this post. It was just word vomit, but hopefully it came out a in clear yet messy ramble.
      I’m only too happy to help anyone! I never want to be that ”mean girl” – you just holla when or if you need me 🙂 Although I’m sure you’re doing a pretty good job without me anyway! HEHE!

      Bee xxx

  2. Maeve Avatar

    YES this was such a bloody brilliant read! Spot on <3
    Maeve // Thrift O’Clock

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      Thanks Maeve, I’m glad you agree!
      Bee xxx

  3. Elise Avatar

    I’ve been saying that a lot lately – you do you. It’s a great mantra! Loved your take on everything. The comparison thing is so easily done but it’s much harder to look behind the blog and see the person and motivations there. A lot of people who deserves success at this may just not get it, but as long as they blog with integrity then they’ll at least be going in the right direction 🙂

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      Hi Elise,
      You’ve really hit the nail on the head. You can try & try and you might get nowhere, but as long as you know deep down that you’ve done all you can do then that’s good enough. I think it’s the whole thing of being ”recognised” and it is a great feeling, but it’s not everything!
      Thanks so much for popping by.
      Bee xxx

  4. suzymarie56 Avatar
    suzymarie56

    With the way things are for me right now (and you know the way things are for me right now), I feel like this post spoke directly to me. I’ve been teetering on the edge of getting rid of my blog entirely and there’s always that small part of me that feels so desperately heartbroken at the idea of giving it up that I never actually do it. At the same time, I feel I have no place in this world of new blogging and you’re right, I selfishly don’t want anyone else to eat my pie. Not to be a hipster, but we were doing this before it was cool Queenie, it’s hard to swallow these new kids on the block!

    However, I know that writing is my thing. I know that bloggers, new or experienced, are unbelievable people and are undoubtedly some of the kindest I’ve ever met. Stamping my feet at my perceived unfairness of it all isn’t going to get me anywhere is it. I guess I need to get those socks pulled up, eh?!

    Thanks for writing this post, I needed it <3 xx

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE DO NOT DELETE YOUR BLOG MRS. Your writing is beautiful, you should never ever dull that sparkle of yours by thinking those thoughts.
      There is room for everyone, you’ve been going a while so there is definitely room for you. Just remember all your achievements along the way.
      We are lucky that we have our community, albeit some people can be testing, but most are wonderful and will completely champion you. I’ll be your little cheerleader for the awesome writer you are!
      Roll those socks up girl, you know what you need to do 🙂
      Bee xxx

  5. Christina L Avatar

    Wonderful post! Oh and I know the trays you are on about lol marble is in right now! Ha I admit the picture perfect lifestyle on Instagram does make me think ‘why isn’t my life that pretty?’ But I’m just no good at setting up a picture! 🙂 I’m happy not to take blogging seriously it’s so easy to get caught up in it all! I simply blog when I want and for me! I’m floored by the talent out there though so always happy to see others succeed

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      We allllllllllll know the trays, hehe! Hell, I even want one & I’m not ashamed to admit it, hehe! We all have our strengths and weaknesses, once you find out what’s what, you can really push forward with that. Blogging is my hobby too, so it’s nice to look at it as a bit of fun, heck, if I do get something good out of it then that is great! I’m so glad that you champion others who do well though! It’s music to my ears 🙂
      Bee xxx

  6. Laura Avatar

    I freaking love this! And now it all makes sense… I thought wow everyone has these awesome expensive marble interiors… And it turns out it’s a tray??!! I love the sentiment: ‘do you’. Spot on post 🙂 xx
    http://www.lovedbylaura.com

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      It’s a bloody tray (Insert the laughy/cry face emoji!) It’s a tray!!! I feel like I have enlightened you just by that one sentence, haha!
      Bee xxx

      1. Laura Avatar

        Haha you totally have!! Now where do I get me one of those trays…!!

        1. QueenBeady Avatar

          TO H&M GIRLLLLL! Haha!
          Bee xxx

          1. Laura Avatar

            Who knew? I thought they just did clothes, when all along they are blog envy enablers!!!

          2. QueenBeady Avatar

            Ohhhh they have their fingers in many pies http://www.hm.com/gb/department/HOME

          3. Laura Avatar

            Mind. Blown!!! 🙂

  7. Sophie Avatar

    I really love this post – I completely agree that there has been a swarm of new bloggers recently and sometimes the oldies can get lost among the waves! But I’m just trying to keep producing good content and do my thing and hopefully that’s enough!! Sophie xxx
    http://www.fashionnomads.com

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      Hi Sophie,
      This is so true, there’s a place for all of us. Eventually, and I mean this term loosely, you sift through the shit, the ones who started just for the free stuff and the ones who actually make a really good go of blogging!
      You’re doing great! Keep going 🙂
      Bee xxx

  8. Alexandra Mayhew Avatar
    Alexandra Mayhew

    Great, great advice little Miss Bee! Loved it. Lexie XX

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      Thanks Lexie – so glad you liked it!
      Bee xxx

  9. Annie Avatar
    Annie

    I loved this post. I’ve felt a bit lost recently in this huge pool of new bloggers, there’s space for all of us and I think we all need to remember that. I just need to get my blogging head back on and go with it. I’ve saved this in my bookmarks for when I’m feeling a bit shit infuture. Lots of love, girl xxx

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      Aw I’m a little honoured that my post gets to sit in that little bookmark of yours – it means a lot. I just feel people are so disillusioned by the whole blogging/social media thing, it’s been made in to a rat race. The oldie bloggers just need to man up, they are oldie bloggers for a reason – because they’ve stuck at it and they are obviously good at it. We just need to believe in ourselves!
      Bee xxx

  10. flourishingpetal Avatar

    Absolutely, loved this post. I’m a new blogger, and at times feel intimidated by the bigger and more stablished bloggers. But as you rightly said, it’s you guys who inspired us to start blogging. I think there is room for all of us, as everyone has their own unique style.

    Thank you for this post, it’s motivated me to keep on going 🙂

    Have a lovely weekend!

    Nadine xx

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      Hi Nadine,
      You should never feel intimidated, we are all nice (once you scratch the surface, hehe!) There is room for all of us, despite being a saturated market! We just got to be ourselves and no-one else. That is what makes us unique!
      I’m so glad you enjoyed this post 🙂
      Bee xxx

  11. 02emmkin Avatar
    02emmkin

    As someone who has been toying with the idea of a blog for about a year this post is also great for me to read. I wanted to set up a beauty blog for fun but the community just seems so intimidating/overcrowded/bitchy that I keep talking myself out of it. I don’t see the point in trying to compete with all those bloody marble trays. But this has reminded me that I wanted to do it for my creative side and to have some fun 🙂
    Been loving your work on your blog this year!

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      You must do it! Never let anyone else interfere with what you want to do, it might be nice to see a completely new & inventive beauty blog! Try it out, the worst that can happen is that it’s not for you? If so, there might be another hobby for you. But, in a positive light it might just be the best thing you ever did!
      Bee xxx

  12. Permanent Procrastination Avatar

    I think you should always strive for your blog to be better! I do anyway!

    Tegan xx – Permanent Procrastination

    Btw check out my sweet Lightbox Giveaway if you haven’t already!

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      You are so right Tegan!
      Bee x

  13. Sarah Prosecco Diaries Avatar
    Sarah Prosecco Diaries

    Interesting that some people get disillusioned with not having “their break” – it’s a negative circle to strive towards something in particular with your blog. Yeah you might make money from it, and have to jump through certain hoops in that respect, but at the end of the day it’s your personal journal and people would get more out of it if they just blog about things they’re passionate about or particularly want to share. Great post!

    Sarah Xx http://www.theproseccodiaries.com @sairey_bearey

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      I could not agree more, it’s not healthy to keep waiting for your break. It’s amazing that when you stop thinking about it, some of the most amazing opportunities come along! So glad you enjoyed this post ❤️
      Bee xxx

  14. City Cookie Avatar

    This is so true! It’s hard to remember sometimes that bloggers who have hugely successful blogs have been working very hard, often for many years, to get to where they are now. I’ve only been at it for 8 months so I need to remind myself not to compare my blog to others too much.

    Anne-Sophie xx
    http://www.citycookie.co.uk

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      That’s it, in the blogging world “time” is not a measurement. If you’re good at it, and can keep it up that’s what will stand you in good steed.
      Bee xxx

  15. Bambi Maklina Avatar
    Bambi Maklina

    I definitely fell into this trap when I started blogging, I felt like all my hard work was worth peanuts because my blog was so terrible compared to the top bloggers so I took a lonnng break – 1 year! Now I realise that you’re absolutely right, it’s not about being like everyone else, it’s about doing your damned best and being proud of what you’ve accomplished!

    Bambi x

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      Every post, every word, every photo is worth so much – you’re putting your heart and soul in to something you enjoy or love even. I’m so glad you’ve managed to get yourself out of your blogging rut and feel proud of what you are producing and achieving! Send over your link when you have chance please 🙂
      Bee xxx

      1. Bambi Maklina Avatar

        Thanks, that means a lot! I’m enjoying learning what I can about blogging, social media, photography etc. now that I’m not so stuck on comparing myself to others.
        My website is maklinamakeup.com if you want a sticky-beak 🙂

        Bambi xx

  16. Gail J Avatar

    I really love your writing because it’s so sincere and I agree with what you said. I actually admire the bloggers like you who appreciate the achievement, even though some will call it a brag. For me, it’s the successful and can be an inspiration to others 🙂

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      Gail, you have put a smile on a girls face today. Comments like that make me so happy. I’m glad you enjoyed it and that those who do well inspire you rather than make you feel awful! Its about pulling everyone up, not standing on each other.
      Thank you for taking the time out to visit!
      Bee xxx

  17. Lily Kittèn Avatar
    Lily Kittèn

    This is such a lovely post – I totally agree that it’s so hard not to compare yourself with other bloggers, but each of us have our own little wins that should be celebrated on a personal level. It’s so easily forgotten.

    Thank you for writing this, it was lovely to read.

    http://www.LilyKitten.com

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      Thanks Lily, people need to just keep going and do what they are good at. Their demise will fall largely on the whole comparing themselves to others.
      Thanks for popping over 🙂
      Bee xxx

  18. Bernadette McKenna Avatar
    Bernadette McKenna

    I’ve been spying on your blog for a while and loving your work that I just HAD to comment on this post! I absolutely love how encouraging you are of everyone. You make me feel like I can achieve anything and I love that! Thank you 🙂

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      Oh Bernadette, this message has ultimately made my day! Thank you so much. I just want people to embrace each others individuality, not by making themselves a carbon copy but actually learning from them to say, hey I’m pretty good at this or that – Believing in yourself is a huge thing. I’ve learnt that over the last few months and it’s working!
      Thank you again,
      Bee xxx

  19. Victoria Nightingale Avatar
    Victoria Nightingale

    Aww this is such a lovely post. I’ve been in a bit of a blogging slump recently but it’s really inspired me to go back to my blog and get back that enthusiasm I had in the beginning x

    vvnightingale.com

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      Hi Victoria,
      We all have those moment, sometimes we need to shut down to reignite the passion and flame. There is nothing wrong with that. Hell, I’ve not posted for a week either. You can do it, when the time is right!
      Bee xxx

  20. Helen Avatar
    Helen

    Lovely post, i can completely understand where you are coming from – I think it’s always good to take a break away now and again, and then return to the blog with a fresh mind 🙂

    I have a new outfit post up on the blog, would love to know your thoughts:

    * Electric Sunrise – Fashion and Lifestyle Blog *

    x

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      Hi Helen
      Absolutely, taking a break is imperative if you want to ignite your passion again. I’ve not posted for a week. I’ve just not had any inspiration but I know I’m going to be very busy these next few weeks indeed! My mojo will be back!
      Bee xxx

  21. Gabby Avatar
    Gabby

    I think you’re completely right, you get what you put in, so work hard and you can take your blog to great places.

    I do find taking a break is good sometimes myself, just because when I come back I have lots of ideas and feel like i want to write, rather than feeling I have to.

    Keep going with your amazing blog and posts Bee! 🙂 xoxo

    http://Www.whatshebuys.co.uk

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      Hi Gabby,
      AMEN to that! You get out. What you put in. Although, I say this & I haven’t posted for a week, OOPS!
      I’m ready to get back on it though!
      Bee xxx

  22. Carolin Avatar
    Carolin

    Blogging is great fun and one of the most beneficial hobbies I’ve ever had, but it can be extremely disheartening at times. Especially when you think you’ve put your heart in everything and worked hard on pictures and then the posts isn’t picked up in the way you’ve hoped for. However, I agree with you that it is flattering when newbie bloggers asked for advice and see you as a ‘role model’.

    Caz | Style Lingua

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      I completely agree, it is disheartening when you don’t always get the response you’d hope – this should make people want to drive harder and work smarter with their blog. It depends what direction you want to go with it, everyone is different and has goals that they want to achieve. I know I do. Thanks for your lovely comment 🙂
      Bee xxx

    1. QueenBeady Avatar

      I’m so so so glad you get this Emma!
      Bee xxx

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